Pssst...8 September 2014

Pssst… always thought divorce was supposed to be a negative thing, but Pssst… hears that Jasmyn could not wait to get divorced from their 2014 Rag partners Vividus Men. If Pssst… were in Jasmyn’s position, Pssst… would also be excited, though. Ever since Vividus Men won Serenade Nationals and have been performing on radio, they have let their egos overcome them. Pssst… just wants to remind Vividus Men to stop acting like characters out of a Disney-themed movie – it’s just creepy when you start serenading strangers on campus.

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Pssst...01 September 2014

Good news, Pssst… is back. We hear the reses have missed us. Pssst… isn’t sure why because they seem to have done a good job of tarnishing their reputations without Pssst’s help.

Pssst… hears Mopanie’s new chicken has caused some problems in the res. In an astonishing display of maturity, two of the corridors have taken to stealing and restealing the poor animal. Pssst… should explain to the boys what picking up chicks really means.

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Pssst...26 May 2014

It appears some reses can’t distinguish between real and fake emergencies. Pssst... knows it must suck to be part of a Groenkloof res but Pssst... reckons Inca need to stop trying to make themselves relevant by trying to burn down their own residence. Pssst... can only guess that this was part of Inca’s ploy to lure old Rag partners Olympus to “save them”.Pssst... thinks that Inca would have had a better opportunity with Curlitzia, though. All that Curlitzia do nowadays is remind everyone that they can save lives, because, you know, studying a medical degree apparently isn’t proof enough of this. Between Curlitzia’s superhero informals and lifeguard-themed Serrie, Pssst... thinks that everyone has caught onto their not-so-subtle hint. You can save lives, Curlitzia. Pssst... and everyone else has got it loud and clear, you can drop it now.

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Pssst...28 July 2014

Starting off with the good news, Pssst… is glad to see that Kiaat have taken Pssst’s… advice and started going to gym. But Pssst… doesn’t think that this means Kiaat should spend every waking minute talking about their gym routine and how much they lift. Leave a little to the imagination boys. No really, please don’t overshare, because all those moves to Jason Derulo’s “Wiggle” showed a side to Kiaat which Pssst… and the whole of Groenkloof would rather not see.

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Pssst...19 May 2014

Pssst… has to start off by asking: is Pssst… the only one that is shocked by Katjiepiering making it into the Serrie finals? Pssst… guesses that wearing short skirts has finally paid off for some reses and maybe others should follow Katjiepiering’s example if they want to be noticed.

No one seems to be too surprised by Boekenhout being in the final, but Pssst… hears the guys have been practising day and night to avoid placing second like they did last year. Pssst… reckons that Boekenhout should stop thinking that they rule student culture. No matter what anyone tells you, cocky isn’t an attractive look.

Pssst… isn’t expecting too much from Mopanie in the Serrie finals. From what Pssst… hears Engineering Week and Oesdag preparations took their toll on Mopanie’s Serrie practices. Pssst... thinks Mopanie needs to get over their mielie obsession, it’s just starting to get creepy, now.

Nerina won’t be in the finals and the holes in their ceiling from the male reses’ performances serve as a bitter reminder of this. Pssst... hears the holes still haven’t been fixed and that Nerina is threatening to send out invoices to Olienhout and Olympus if they don’t fix them.

Thursday nights at the clubhouses are over for good and Pssst... guesses that Katjiepiering cried the hardest (after Kollege, of course). Pssst... wonders where Katjiepiering plans to relocate to now.

Kollege’s last Thursday night social included everyone from Katjiepiering to Klaradyn and Lilium. Pssst... must admit that Lilium looked out of place even before they started to re-enact scenes from their risqué Serrie for the whole of Kollege. Pssst... needs to remind Lilium that Serrie is actually over and that the points they will be scoring from Kollege with those dance moves won’t count towards Serrie. Then again, Pssst... has a suspicion that it is exactly what Lilium wants. Pssst... thinks that Lilium should stay on Groenkloof campus where they can’t embarrass themselves as much. Maybe Lilium can do as Zinnia does and have sleepovers at Kiaat five nights a week.

Taaibos probably drowned their sorrows on Thursday night, not because of the clubhouse situation, but because Katjiepiering and Klaradyn both gave them bad marks for their Serrie. Pssst... suggests Taaibos get over it and stop sub-tweeting the girls’ reses. 

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