Pssst… is grateful it isn’t in Maroela’s shoes. As if it isn’t bad enough that Maroela are forced to live in the same vicinity as their greatest enemies, they went and lost to them at the most important rugby match of the year. Pssst… bets Mopanie >are quite pleased with themselves but Pssst… reckons Mopanie should learn to be a little bit more humble. No one likes a braggart. Pssst… knows for a fact that Katjiepiering don’t. Pssst… hears the girls were not impressed when they looked out their windows one night last week to find the Mopanie semis running around naked for Katjiepiering’s pleasure. Pssst… doesn’t know any res that will find pleasure in Mopanie’s cry for attention, except for Magrietjie, of course.
Pssst… always thought divorce was supposed to be a negative thing, but Pssst… hears that Jasmyn could not wait to get divorced from their 2014 Rag partners Vividus Men. If Pssst… were in Jasmyn’s position, Pssst… would also be excited, though. Ever since Vividus Men won Serenade Nationals and have been performing on radio, they have let their egos overcome them. Pssst… just wants to remind Vividus Men to stop acting like characters out of a Disney-themed movie – it’s just creepy when you start serenading strangers on campus.
Starting off with the good news, Pssst… is glad to see that Kiaat have taken Pssst’s… advice and started going to gym. But Pssst… doesn’t think that this means Kiaat should spend every waking minute talking about their gym routine and how much they lift. Leave a little to the imagination boys. No really, please don’t overshare, because all those moves to Jason Derulo’s “Wiggle” showed a side to Kiaat which Pssst… and the whole of Groenkloof would rather not see.
Good news, Pssst… is back. We hear the reses have missed us. Pssst… isn’t sure why because they seem to have done a good job of tarnishing their reputations without Pssst’s help.
Pssst… hears Mopanie’s new chicken has caused some problems in the res. In an astonishing display of maturity, two of the corridors have taken to stealing and restealing the poor animal. Pssst… should explain to the boys what picking up chicks really means.
It appears some reses can’t distinguish between real and fake emergencies. Pssst... knows it must suck to be part of a Groenkloof res but Pssst... reckons Inca need to stop trying to make themselves relevant by trying to burn down their own residence. Pssst... can only guess that this was part of Inca’s ploy to lure old Rag partners Olympus to “save them”.Pssst... thinks that Inca would have had a better opportunity with Curlitzia, though. All that Curlitzia do nowadays is remind everyone that they can save lives, because, you know, studying a medical degree apparently isn’t proof enough of this. Between Curlitzia’s superhero informals and lifeguard-themed Serrie, Pssst... thinks that everyone has caught onto their not-so-subtle hint. You can save lives, Curlitzia. Pssst... and everyone else has got it loud and clear, you can drop it now.